Saturday, August 30, 2008
Friday, August 29, 2008
Elephant in the Ring #4: Not Brian Kendrick....but THE Brian Kendrick or THE Big Show
What is the WWE writing department doing? I mean, first you have Santazon...then you have a kick ass HitC match with Taker and Edge...and now....THE Brian Kendrick could be your new WWE champion. Let me say that one to you again. THE BRIAN KENDRICK could be your new double-you double-you E champion!
How does that sit in with you? Because, quite honestly, it's about freakin' time. What else are you going to have him do? Win another tag title? Jump to RAW....turn back into Spanky...and battle rap John Cena every week? THE Brian Kendrick has talent and, finally, they have gone from giving people with credibility and movie roles and all of that jazz title shots and giving the little guys, like THE Brian Kendrick and THE Shelton Benjamins of the world, a chance to shine on the big screen.
I, honestly, would not mind seeing Brian Kendrick pulling out of the Scramble as your champion...hell, I'd be happy if he won the title and, then, lost it during the match. It would be pretty cool to see the WWE actually thinking that a little guy like Mr. Kendrick would become WWE champion.
However, on Smackdown (in Pittsburgh...which I did not attend) Big Show got angry about not being in the scramble and who are you going to pick on out of the five superstars (four if you don't include HHH)? That's right....THE Brian Kendrick. I am not sure if they are going to keep the participants like it is, or they are actually deciding to take the Big Show and slap him in the middle of that pack and have Brian Kendrick looking from the outside in instead of from the inside out, as he is doing right now.
So...we have a few more weeks to digest the fact that we may have to call Brian Kendrick a FORMER WWE champion or we may have a crappy set up for a crappy match with the Big Show replaccing THE Brian Kendrick. It doesn't matter...Big Show and THE Brian Kendrick are THE fourth installment of THE Elephant in the Ring.
How does that sit in with you? Because, quite honestly, it's about freakin' time. What else are you going to have him do? Win another tag title? Jump to RAW....turn back into Spanky...and battle rap John Cena every week? THE Brian Kendrick has talent and, finally, they have gone from giving people with credibility and movie roles and all of that jazz title shots and giving the little guys, like THE Brian Kendrick and THE Shelton Benjamins of the world, a chance to shine on the big screen.
I, honestly, would not mind seeing Brian Kendrick pulling out of the Scramble as your champion...hell, I'd be happy if he won the title and, then, lost it during the match. It would be pretty cool to see the WWE actually thinking that a little guy like Mr. Kendrick would become WWE champion.
However, on Smackdown (in Pittsburgh...which I did not attend) Big Show got angry about not being in the scramble and who are you going to pick on out of the five superstars (four if you don't include HHH)? That's right....THE Brian Kendrick. I am not sure if they are going to keep the participants like it is, or they are actually deciding to take the Big Show and slap him in the middle of that pack and have Brian Kendrick looking from the outside in instead of from the inside out, as he is doing right now.
So...we have a few more weeks to digest the fact that we may have to call Brian Kendrick a FORMER WWE champion or we may have a crappy set up for a crappy match with the Big Show replaccing THE Brian Kendrick. It doesn't matter...Big Show and THE Brian Kendrick are THE fourth installment of THE Elephant in the Ring.
Monday, August 25, 2008
(First time...two-a-week...)Elephant in the Ring #3: Glamerella
Sonny had Cher...John Lennon had Sonny Ohno...more wrestling terms, Chyna had Triple H...Kane had Tori....Triple H (more rescently) has Stephanie McMahon...and, now, the most dominant couple in the World Wrestling Entertainment? Santino Marella and Beth Pheonix!
I don't know about you...but I am thrilled to see these two together. One contradicts the other so much it makes for some hillarious insight on various subjects. With Santino intentionally making fun of names (a la the prime Jericho when he called, most famously, Chris Benoit....Chris Ben-Oy-T) and Beth Pheonix playing the Chyna role perfectly....hell, even better then Chyna cause Beth is hot...ter then Chyna (still doesn't top Victoria, barnone). It's a match made in the WWE writing depot's lap!
It's now the writing department to turn this into a match made in heaven and not a match made in hell. If they want to make this work, they need to write in some awesome lines...some awesome sketches....awesome promos and awesome matches.
Now, I really don't do this a ton...but I must say I think I know how they are going to work this out. Santino vs. Beth Pheonix...title v. title. Now, I know what you're going to say...you're going to say "Come on, Zach...that's totally predictable....Beth's going to win." That I say to you...oh no it's not all predictable. Remember back in the olden days? Someone by the name of Harvey Whippleman dresses in drag and you have your FIRST MAN AS YOUR WOMAN'S CHAMPIONSHIP?! So...let's rewrite history, WWE writers staff, and make Santino the ONLY MAN THAT'S NOT IN DRAG to win the WWE Women's Championship!
But, like I said...I'm not making the bucks to come up with this stuff...I am just a blogger with a mind...and I just use it. If you want to give Beth Pheonix the IC championship be my guest, that would be good as well. But, as of right now...Santazon is your 3rd installation of the Elephants in the Ring.
Just a little heads up, expect #2 for the week to be up this week and expect it to be about.....THE Brian Kendrick as THE WWE champion (for a possible second, of course)...enjoy.
I don't know about you...but I am thrilled to see these two together. One contradicts the other so much it makes for some hillarious insight on various subjects. With Santino intentionally making fun of names (a la the prime Jericho when he called, most famously, Chris Benoit....Chris Ben-Oy-T) and Beth Pheonix playing the Chyna role perfectly....hell, even better then Chyna cause Beth is hot...ter then Chyna (still doesn't top Victoria, barnone). It's a match made in the WWE writing depot's lap!
It's now the writing department to turn this into a match made in heaven and not a match made in hell. If they want to make this work, they need to write in some awesome lines...some awesome sketches....awesome promos and awesome matches.
Now, I really don't do this a ton...but I must say I think I know how they are going to work this out. Santino vs. Beth Pheonix...title v. title. Now, I know what you're going to say...you're going to say "Come on, Zach...that's totally predictable....Beth's going to win." That I say to you...oh no it's not all predictable. Remember back in the olden days? Someone by the name of Harvey Whippleman dresses in drag and you have your FIRST MAN AS YOUR WOMAN'S CHAMPIONSHIP?! So...let's rewrite history, WWE writers staff, and make Santino the ONLY MAN THAT'S NOT IN DRAG to win the WWE Women's Championship!
But, like I said...I'm not making the bucks to come up with this stuff...I am just a blogger with a mind...and I just use it. If you want to give Beth Pheonix the IC championship be my guest, that would be good as well. But, as of right now...Santazon is your 3rd installation of the Elephants in the Ring.
Just a little heads up, expect #2 for the week to be up this week and expect it to be about.....THE Brian Kendrick as THE WWE champion (for a possible second, of course)...enjoy.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Elephant in the Ring #2 - Rey Mysterio Dead?
So, FINALLY the mystery is solved. What was in the burlap sack. But...what the hell did it mean? Kane killed Rey Mysterio? Who knows? But I think this might be Kane's ticket BACK to insane-hood. This might be the way that gives Kane that "heel feel" back. Because Kane has been on the heel-face roller coaster and has been riding it for way too long.
For instance, when he's heel....he's Taker's brother....he's dead...he sits up...he's indestructable....he's terrorizing everyone in his path. When he's face...he's a jobber....he slowly gets up....he's undesirable....he's....terrible (the bad version to be...not the "Ivan the Terrible" terrible...but more the "Brooklyn Brawler" terrible).
Kane needs a psycho angle, again. I know I am not the only one that misses the whole "Kane is psycho" angle that he does once every year. This year it's Mysterio, last year it was "May 19th", leading up to WrestleMania 20 it was that Taker was dead, and the list can go on and on my friend.
But here's where things get creepy...why Rey Mysterio? Is he ditching the mask and taking a serious role? Is he going to plan to be a smaller version of the Undertaker? It's not going to be easy to make this work.
Last time Kane said that someone was battered and bruised and totally scared from head to toe...wasn't it Kane when he was masked? Then he revealed....nothing was wrong with him and that it was, basically, all in his head. So does this mean him "hurting" Rey Mysterio is all....in his head and he just bought a replica Rey mask in WWE ShopZone? Or did he, finally, do something psycho to a wrestler (IF YOU SAY J.R. IS A WRESTLER I WILL FIND YOU AND MAKE YOU TAP THE FRIG OUT!).
It's something to keep an eye on in the weeks to come. Is Rey going to come out next week/a few weeks from now with a mask? Is he going to be unmasked like he did in WCW when Y2J unmasked him? Is he going to be brutally maimed and scarred like Kane said? It will be an interesting way to see how the WWE team will decide to do when this whole thing unravels in a few weeks.
As for now....if he's alive or dead....Kane and Rey Mysterio is the new Elephant in the Ring....and don't say that date!
For instance, when he's heel....he's Taker's brother....he's dead...he sits up...he's indestructable....he's terrorizing everyone in his path. When he's face...he's a jobber....he slowly gets up....he's undesirable....he's....terrible (the bad version to be...not the "Ivan the Terrible" terrible...but more the "Brooklyn Brawler" terrible).
Kane needs a psycho angle, again. I know I am not the only one that misses the whole "Kane is psycho" angle that he does once every year. This year it's Mysterio, last year it was "May 19th", leading up to WrestleMania 20 it was that Taker was dead, and the list can go on and on my friend.
But here's where things get creepy...why Rey Mysterio? Is he ditching the mask and taking a serious role? Is he going to plan to be a smaller version of the Undertaker? It's not going to be easy to make this work.
Last time Kane said that someone was battered and bruised and totally scared from head to toe...wasn't it Kane when he was masked? Then he revealed....nothing was wrong with him and that it was, basically, all in his head. So does this mean him "hurting" Rey Mysterio is all....in his head and he just bought a replica Rey mask in WWE ShopZone? Or did he, finally, do something psycho to a wrestler (IF YOU SAY J.R. IS A WRESTLER I WILL FIND YOU AND MAKE YOU TAP THE FRIG OUT!).
It's something to keep an eye on in the weeks to come. Is Rey going to come out next week/a few weeks from now with a mask? Is he going to be unmasked like he did in WCW when Y2J unmasked him? Is he going to be brutally maimed and scarred like Kane said? It will be an interesting way to see how the WWE team will decide to do when this whole thing unravels in a few weeks.
As for now....if he's alive or dead....Kane and Rey Mysterio is the new Elephant in the Ring....and don't say that date!
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Elephant in the Ring #1 - Mike Adamle:GM
His first time on television Mike Adamle called Jeff Hardy...Jeff Harvey...and the rest is history.
Mike Adamle is not, by far, the first choice...or second....or third....or even fourth on the list of possible general manager of RAW. But it is not known, as of right now, what the future holds for the "Adamle Original" of Adamle being a big part in the decision processing. He could pull off some descent matches and become one of the main stays on RAW for a long time to come or, like it was the case for other general managers that came before him, a few months of power under the GM moniker...:: cough :: Regal! :: cough :: Sorry, there's allergies here in Pittsburgh.
But Adamle has potential...Adamle can do some good in the WWE but the only thing he needs to work on is his reactions and his tone when he talks. A pure example of this is last week on RAW...the line, basically, was "HEY! STOP IT!" and what does Adamle say? "Hey. stop it." The man needs to make himself known to the people...he needs to take charge and relax. If he just gets the nerves gone from seein tens of thousands of people and millions watching all around the world (probably 15 times more the audience then an American Gladiators crowd...sorry Lasor), Adamle could be the best GM they had since Eric Bischoff.
But as of right now, Mike Adam-Oli....congradulations, you are the very first Elephant in the Ring!
Mike Adamle is not, by far, the first choice...or second....or third....or even fourth on the list of possible general manager of RAW. But it is not known, as of right now, what the future holds for the "Adamle Original" of Adamle being a big part in the decision processing. He could pull off some descent matches and become one of the main stays on RAW for a long time to come or, like it was the case for other general managers that came before him, a few months of power under the GM moniker...:: cough :: Regal! :: cough :: Sorry, there's allergies here in Pittsburgh.
But Adamle has potential...Adamle can do some good in the WWE but the only thing he needs to work on is his reactions and his tone when he talks. A pure example of this is last week on RAW...the line, basically, was "HEY! STOP IT!" and what does Adamle say? "Hey. stop it." The man needs to make himself known to the people...he needs to take charge and relax. If he just gets the nerves gone from seein tens of thousands of people and millions watching all around the world (probably 15 times more the audience then an American Gladiators crowd...sorry Lasor), Adamle could be the best GM they had since Eric Bischoff.
But as of right now, Mike Adam-Oli....congradulations, you are the very first Elephant in the Ring!
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